Chapter 4

Okay, before I start everything.

This post is really, very emotional.

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I never thought I'm that kind of...

overly-attached girl

until someone stops texting me for 1 day.

Pfft.

1 day, long enough

Imagine you texted someone almost everyday for 500+ days

and suddenly boom!

that person disappears for 1 day.

BUT.

I know you're busy...

but...

can I just please,

for one message to let me know that you're alive?

I admit my ego and pride is high,

but I felt stupid for sharing my life with you but

I don't get any response.

AT ALL.

I am mad of course,

you might say I'm very possessive.

But if I'm not, please doubt me for being with you for so long.

I know. I know you're busy .. for you church things.

I knew I shouldn't complaint over it.

But even how busy am I,

I still text you once a day.

This is very sad,

because missing you is giving me a hard time.

Maybe this is stupid but....

you will never understand.

In this time, last year.

Also, holiday time.

We broke up.

Same reason.

the only difference is,

last time we're together.

this year we're not.

I can't complaint.

I don't even have the rights.

I can't even ...

Although I know it's good for you,

I shouldn't be here complaining about it.

I shouldn't.

That feeling is like stabbing a knife in my heart over and over again.

I know! It's been 527 days,

I should let it go.

But why I can't?

Although you're just a friend now,

and we're never getting back together.

Yes, I know I understand.

Perhaps I need more time.

More time to heal.

I feel like an idiot.

I don't expect anyone to understand my feelings,

you could just ignore Chapter 4.

because it doesn't make any sense at all. 

Yea.